I Worked As a Professional Bird Scarer Last Summer in The Oil Sands In Canada. Whenever Someone Asks What The Job Entailed I Show Them This Video

I Worked As a Professional Bird Scarer Last Summer in The Oil Sands In Canada. Whenever Someone Asks What The Job Entailed I Show Them This Video

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  1. I had a neighbor who would scare the birds out of his trees almost daily. He’d walk around outside with two pieces of wood he’d clap together. It was effective. Birds would fly out of the trees then shit all over everything directly beneath them. Of course his sidewalk and drive was full of birdshit.

    I never understood this behavior. The birds come back every day. They weren’t going to go somewhere else and I’m pretty sure they would have a lot less shit in their yard if they just let the birds do their thing.

  2. Professional Bird Scarer

    If that job title ever came across my desk on a resume I’m hiring you. I’m in marketing. I don’t care. You’re hired.

  3. Pro tip for any wannabe-bird-scarers out there:

    Another thing that works fairly well is to get a sturdy foam glider, put a grommet into one wing, then affix a thin string running between it and a long fishing pole. With some practice you can spin the pole around and control how the glider flies. Add some streamers and whistlers or whatever and it will move most any bird. Of course, the fact that there’s some psychotic human dancing around in the middle of that maelstrom probably adds to the effect.

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